Saturday, January 10, 2009

Opening up

Some astounding things happening right now. Yesterday 5pm I took my first dose of homeopathic sulphur remedy. I stayed up till 2am again, veeery tired in the early evening but pushed through so I could see Silke and Hannah on the webcam (they're still in Germany). Then I just was on autopilot finishing some mobile-browser testing.

This morning I woke up as usual without the alarm, but a little disoriented from the shorter night. I felt various forces of urgency -- "a full day" ahead -- had to start accomplishing minor tasks right away. Then I thought, this isn't working so great -- how about some meditation (Russell Simmons style)? Seemed like a *really bad* idea, which means it was a really good idea. :)

After just maybe 5 minutes I "woke up," mentally this time. Almost immediately I noticed that the eczema on my face had softened. I had to look in the mirror -- it almost felt like it had vanished overnight, though the appearance was the same. Now as I'm writing it's still the same. The burning itch has been replaced by a healing itch, like a wound healing.

After a great coaching session with Maria (more on this later), I was cycling home when I noticed another burst. I came out of the Solano Ave tunnel and I looked down at my gear shifter -- it was like my vision had suddenly gotten much clearer. Like those sports videos, where every frame is crystalline. I burst down the hill and raced home. As I approached home along Ashbury, I was two gears higher than I had been after work on Wednesday.

Why am I writing all of this here? I don't have any particular agenda. It's just a good exercise for me to get the words out, one word at a time, one step at a time. And I'm confronting fears of overexposure.

Measuring what?

On Tuesday I had lunch with Alan at Cocina Poblana. The things we do and talk about every day make a huge difference. Example: Barack Obama was not planning to be president when he was bickering with his friends in college. We're always preparing for the Big Thing we're meant to do.

Then on Thursday I sat down with Adam T., the building guard. He cautioned me that Obama is not going to clean house and make things right, because the system is already thoroughly set up to continue as it is. He's right. We won't see immediate results. But my conclusion is that the individual person with vision can in fact make a huge difference, in the longer term.

I have been preocuppied with measurable results. For example: the triple bottom line is supposed to make the right things happen, by changing the playing field. That may be necessary, but it's not sufficient. We still need leaders with vision. That includes presidents, teachers, and parents. I think I might be two of those things.

Sunday, January 04, 2009

Jetlag

Jetlag is a great time to start. So I'm writing down ideas and conversations here on this blog.

Right now I'm reading Do You! by Russell Simmons. (Can you tell?) And I'm reading The Audacity of Hope by Barack Obama.

I'm working on choosing a career where I can improve many people's lives. I'm working at a bank right now, which is actually a fantastic job. Money is not bad or evil, it is powerful, so my work is empowering for millions of people. It's just not the kind of good I am meant to give.